This Blog Post Has No Title......or Theme

I don't know exactly what I'm going to say in this post. I have thousands upon thousands of thoughts and feelings trying to cram themselves into my brain. I need to let them out.
Be prepared for anything.
X3

I don't like college. I didn't before I started, and I'm not really too crazy about it now. I spend, literally, the whole day doing schoolwork. I have to do it quickly, every chance I get, or I might not get it done in time. I wish I didn't have to take the full amount of possible credits. But I have to get all the required general courses out of the way so that if my theatre career fails, I'll have some college education and people will actually want to hire me (that's at least how my mom puts it).
Of course, I don't really have enough money to afford it all. I'd get a job if I had time. My mom keeps telling me I should get some kind of job and just work weekends. But my weekends tend to be busy too. And if I gave away whatever I have left of my weekend I wouldn't have any more free time for the entire term.
I can feel the stress building every day. All I can ever do is work on things for my general ed classes. I barely have time to participate in music or theatre. If I don't do that, how on earth can I be ready for the New York Film Academy? I need to be focusing on that. But I can't.
Sometimes I'd feel that I'd really rather finish this term, get a job, and save up money to go to the NYFA. Then at the same time maybe I could take the theatre and music classes at Kirkwood and focus on becoming better at musical theatre performer. Then once I saved up a good amount of money and had more expertise in theatre and music, I could audition to get into the NYFA. If I make it, then I go to New York. If I don't, I'll keep working and I'll find more ways to perfect my theatre skills.
But then what would happen if I couldn't get in? Or if after the NYFA I couldn't get any work?
I, of course, would have to get another job while I waited. I don't think I'd be looking for the most amazing, high paying job ever. Just one that pays enough, is flexible, and is something I ENJOY. Never get a job if you know its going to be one you hate. I've already learned that lesson.
What am I going to do with some of the things I'm learning anyway? Its not like I have enough skill to find a job in any of the general ed stuff. I'm only good at fine and performing arts. I sing, I act, I dance (okay, that one might need some work still- I mean, I'm fine if I have simple choreography, but I don't really know any moves or styles really well), I write, I draw.
I once saw a piece of flair (yay facebook) that said, "I do many things well- none of which generate income."
Yep. That's me.
I'm not trying to be negative, I'm just stating the truth. I can't get away from the feeling that those things (singing, acting, writing, etc.) are what I was made to do.
My goal is to be an artist. In the fine arts, the performing arts, whatever.
But I feel like I'm not obtaining that goal. I wouldn't have the time to obtain it. And without the constant practice, I feel everything I worked for might fade away before I even have the chance to apply to the NYFA.

....Time. What I would do for some of that. I'm sick of not having time to do anything. I don't even have time to eat. Most days I don't eat until dinnertime. I never see my friends anymore. I don't have time to make friends at college cuz I'm so busy doing schoolwork.
I hate schoolwork. It keeps getting in the way of everything that's important to me.
And you know how its been said that every teacher thinks their subject is the most important? I could see how that was true in high school. The instructors at college are bent on proving it.

Maybe I'm just overreacting. But all the students and teachers who have heard about my schedule are surprised too. So I'm at least on the right track.

I'm just waiting for Thanksgiving break to come. Even though I have to get my wisdom teeth out.... I think friday that it starts? I hope I'll be able to eat Thanksgiving dinner.
Though the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade is higher up on my priority list for that day. I cannot go through Thanksgiving without watching at least most of the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade.
The performances are nice, but I like watching the floats. They're so creative. How cool would it be to design a float for that parade?

Anyway. No need to go off on a tangent about Thanksgiving. Though I don't really want to talk about Kirkwood anymore.
Before I find something else to talk about though, I do have to point out that if I went to the New York Film Academy, I could see the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade live. CX

It must be fun living in New York. Once you get past the gray dull parts at least.
I went there for the first time last Christmas. I wasn't really excited to go during Christmas (I like spending Christmas at home, thanks. I like being around friends and family. Not to mention that because my parents decided to take us to New York, I was who-knows-how-many miles away from my boyfriend, who I had recently started dating and who I didn't want to be away from on Christmas. We need to make up for that this year, I think. :3).
It was very gray. Everything was gray. The buildings. The streets. The sky. And my mood, as we trudged through the crowds on the sidewalks.
Half the people I walked past were speaking some other language. That was interesting. Most of them were not even vaguely familiar to me.
I think I saw a crazy person too. He was mumbling random things, dressed in torn, mismatched clothing, and his hair was all over the place. He was standing on the sidewalk, doing nothing in particular but mumbling, looking around and acting as if he was the only one there.

And it was cold. It was ridiculously cold. It was colder than where I live now, which is a tundra most of the year (or at least it seems like it. Last year the first snow was in October). I packed some warm things, but they were not ever warm enough. And of course, we walked everywhere (that's kinda what you do in New York), so we were constantly out in the cold.

There were good things about the trip to (I'll elaborate later), but I didn't care at the time. I just wanted to go home.

For the first month or two I had decided I didn't like New York. But three or four months later I found myself somehow not only liking it, but wanting to go back. I didnt know what inspired the change. I still don't. But it happened.

Like I said before, it wasn't all bad. Not by a long shot. There were a whole bunch of fun things that I really liked about New York.
Maybe I just didn't like leaving everyone and going to New York during Christmas. I can be quite stuck on tradition with certain things, especially Christmas.

If you ever go to New York, you need to check out Little Italy. Its necessary. The food is good, the people are super friendly, and the experience is just plain fun.
My family and I were walking through Little Italy around lunch time, trying to find a place to eat. Then suddenly, a man called out to us.
"Are you hungry?" he said cheerily in his thick Italian accent, "You should eat here!"
He pointed to the restaurant behind him. My dad opened his mouth to say something, but the Italian man beat him to it.
"The food is amazing here! I can prove it too you!"
He ran up to the restaurant's front window. There was a small group of people eating at a table just behind the glass. To our surprise, he raised his hand and banged on the window. The group looked up.
The Italian man gave them an enthusiastic thumbs up. They smiled and returned his gesture. Then he walked quickly back to where we were standing.
"See? You come in! We'll take care of you!"
None of us could resist.
It was just as fun inside. All the food was amazing, and I enjoyed hearing the employees talk to each other in their accents. And they all had very Italian names.
As we were leaving the restaurant, we asked the man to take a picture of us in front of the entrance (yeah, we're such tourists, I know. Or at least my mom is. It was her idea). He happily agreed, taking our picture as we stood on the patio in front of the restaurant.
Before we had a chance to walk down, he spread his arms and asked so everyone around could hear, "How was the food!"
"Good!" We replied, grinning.

So yeah. Go there. Its totally worth it. CX

Another awesome experience my sister and I had was going to see Wicked on Broadway.
So. Incredibly. Awesome.
I won't give too many details for those who haven't seen it (I know there are people out there who haven't. Somewhere. Also, there would be too much to say here anyway. Yeah. It was that awesome), but I'll say it was an incredible experience, especially for a theatre nerd like me.
:3

It just occurred to me that I should put some of the pictures we took on here. I'll do that now. :D

This is us in front of the restaurant in Little Italy. For the sake of future clarity, I'm going to tell you that I'm the one in front with the ridiculously lengthy scarf.
"How's the food!!!" C:

We were taking the ferry over to see the Statue of Liberty. They were supposed to take us past it, but unfortunately they didn't get very close to it. My mom isn't in the picture cuz she took it.

This was another part I loved about New York. Times Square. After seeing it in countless movies, it was kinda cool to actually be there myself. Plus all the stores there are all decked out like you wouldn't believe. And there's no such thing as night in Times Square. All the lights make it bright as day.

My sister and I in front of the Clock of the Time Dragon at the Gershwin Theatre. Yay Wicked! XD

 We were sad. We didn't want to leave Oz.
There was a guy in line who laughed at us as we posed for this picture. Nice to know that we're funny. Even funnier since we took this when we first walked in, before the show even started.
Yeah, I wouldn't want to leave Oz, especially if I hadn't even had a chance to go there yet! :O
X3

We felt like taking a picture???
Again, my mom's doing.
My brother (the older one) is missing in this one cuz he's taking the picture.
If you look, you can see the sign for Ellen's Stardust Diner in the background. Awesome restaurant. The waiters and waitresses are performers who are trying to make it onto Broadway, and they take turns singing popular show tunes in between waiting tables!
If I needed a job while at the NYFA, or if I needed a job while trying to get on Broadway, that's where I'd want to work. :3

My siblings and I by the Gershwin Theatre Stage Door. Very cool. CX

Tell me it doesn't look like he wants to pump me full of lead. :O
You can find this piece of artwork in New York's massive Toys R Us. It not only has a lego replica of Chewbacca, but it has a full sized ferris wheel, a giant floor piano, and a giant animatronic Tyrannosaurus Rex that looks around the room and roars.
It also has a small but totally awesome Harry Potter section. :3

If you want to see what the floor piano looks like, here's a link to a video of something you might see if you were there:

http://www.livevideo.com/video/55F53050FA084BAC9FF0AB1EE8308199/girls-doing-bach-on-a-floor-pi.aspx

This is the scenery you find when you first walk into the New York Disney Store. We so did NOT get to spend enough time here!
I say that because I'm the world's biggest Disney nerd.
I'm still not sure what the figures behind us are supposed to be. Dressed up Christmas trees? Despite the awesomeness of the rest of the store, these figures in the entrance weirded me out a little bit.

Best hat ever. Wish I would've gotten it. :(
I was saving my money to buy Christmas presents for people. Also, as cute as it is, I don't know if I'd wear it often.

It looks like he was aiming that snowball at me, but he was actually aiming at my dad. I'm half smiling because it was freezing.

I think if I had to travel the subway alone, I would get very lost. There was a lot of entertainment in the subway station though. We saw an amazing a Capella group (they sang Lean On Me-very cool), a drummer, and a dude playing bagpipes. And then there were the occasional sightings of people who were singing loudly along with their iPod.

That's another thing I liked about New York. I saw so many people just randomly singing. It was awesome. No one cared. It was totally normal. So of course, I had to try it. I didn't sing quite so loud, but I was still audible. No one looked at me funny. It made me happy. If I went to the NYFA I know I would have moments where I would sing while walking down the street. I would apologize to my friends for saying that, but since they're all choir kids, they would probably start singing first.
I wonder what would happen if I brought the cast from my high school's fall musical last year ("I Love You, You're Perfect, Now Change" down there to randomly perform on the street. I'll bet we could do it, and get applause for it too! X3

This picture is funny because of the sign. If what it says is true, then that means three fourths of the people driving down the road would have to cough up $350.
Gotta love New York. :3

Lombardi's Pizza, America's first pizzeria, is an incredibly crowded place. Probably because their pizza's so good.

The purple fedora I'm wearing I bought at New York. Not that I ever wear it now. But its fun to have a hat from New York anyway. CX

Alright, that's enough about New York. I'm going to end this post now so that it doesn't become a novel.

Thanks for viewing! :3